Thanksgiving 2016

It seems like Thanksgiving was forever ago... we've been so busy.

This year, we headed up to Clarion Thursday morning.  We could have went Wednesday night, but just decided to stay in and get a good nights rest in our own beds.  We got to the farm around 10:20 Thursday morning...  and we started prepping the food, and just hanging out.  The minute I walked in, I just felt better... I've been having such a hard time at home, in our own home lately.   I'm just so antsy, and on edge...  (random spurts of just being all out of whack and so sad, but then completely normal the next minute) --- but being at the farm put some ease on me, which seems weird kinda.  I mean, Mom isn't there...  so I would have thought it would make me nervous or even more sad, etc...  but it doesn't.  I think just being there with Dad and my sisters is comforting... for now.  So I really enjoyed our time up in Clarion. 

Anyway, we had a great meal... and literally just hung out all day.  A bunch of us played Phase 10, which took forever, but we had good laughs.  We hung out, ate and hung out some more.  We all went into the cemetery that afternoon too...  Ryan had bought some nice flowers for Mom, so we put those there, and just gathered...  It was bittersweet having us all there again, all together.  And Dad too - he's had a hard time stopping at the grave to talk to Mom, so I think it was special to have us all there with him.  Cora and I blew tons of kisses to Mom, which makes my tears just fall and fall... still.  We miss her.

The rest of the night we ate some more... and that's about it.  Most everyone headed out around 7:30, then we stayed with Dad that night.  The kids did pretty well - slept pretty good too.  

We headed back home Friday late morning to just have another day at home.  I got a feather up my butt and got our Christmas trees out.  They look great, minus the upstairs one is not decorated.  We are going to finally get new ornaments (after 8 years maybe?!?!?)  I just need to do that this week... which will probably take me forever to choose.  ha.  

Anyway, we had a good day at home Friday and that evening. 

It was a nice Thanksgiving holiday.  I smile, and I ache at the same time.  I want things to be better... and I want to be happier.  I guess it's going to take some more time. 

Grand kiddos with Papa (or "G-Pa" as some of the older kids call him!)