Weekend - and October

Friday:
I took Friday off from work... no real reason besides using up my PTO.  I still have about 3 weeks left to use... probably not going to happen, but I'm going to attempt!  I literally hung out at home all day - cleaned a little, did laundry and watched TV.  It was a very nice day.

Friday night we just stayed home...  the kids and Ryan made a cake, which was fun...  and they did a movie night.  That's about it!

Saturday:
a gloomy day... rained nearly all day...  Ryan went to work, kids and I just hung out.  Tried to keep busy since we couldn't be outside.  We did lunch, and then went to Kayson's football game, in the rain and wind!!!  Cora was a trooper for about 35 of the 50 minutes!  Then her and I sat in the warm, dry car!  

Ryan then needed to do more work - at the church (he's a busy, important guy lately!!)  Kids and I hung out - had Olivia over to play for a little bit.  Then we met up with Mike, Holly and their boys for pizza.  They are newer to the area (met through church) and we've really hit it off...  it was a good couple hours. 

Sunday:
Church...  and then the day turned super warm and beautiful.  We had a good day of not doing much, but the kids played fairly well, Ryan mowed our awesome green grass now!  Just a nice day...  

and my thoughts about October.
Stinks.
I kind of hate the month of October...  and the 23rd of every month...  things are hard still with missing Mom and just wishing she was here and not sick with that terrible disease.  October was the month we fought with her and put her in the care center.   October was the month she died.  I just hate it.  I try so darn hard every day...  I try to put a smile on my face when I 'need' to, but the last couple weeks, it's been harder than normal.  I'm sad.  I'm sad that a year has nearly passed...  a year.  What in the world have we done in a year?  sooo much.  So much has happened, we've done so many things, our kids have changed so much.  Everything is different.  We've experienced new and different things.  Life happens.  so fast.  And as much as I love it - and as much as I'm thankful for so much... I still hurt.  I ache.  My heart hurts...  I miss my Mom.