Memorial Day weekend 2016

Our long weekend is over!!!  Another sad face.
I actually had a super long weekend... 5 days, and it was heaven.  Why do we have to work?!?!?

Thursday and Friday I took off from work.  Nikki and I held another garage sale Thursday night (which was a huge success) and Friday during the day (not as huge of a success!)  But that's ok.  We got rid of a lot...  but we still had stuff to put back in the basement!  

I enjoyed Thursday to just myself.  I hung around the house Thursday prepping for the sale.  I had barely touched the garage sale stuff for weeks, so I had a lot to do, but it was ok... I was alone and just enjoyed it.  I met an old friend for a quick lunch, then back to the house to work some more.  It was a great little day. 

Friday was the sale again... again, not very successful due to the rain.  Friday night we grabbed supper, and back home to relax.  I was completely wiped out.  

Saturday:
Kayson had a hair cut appointment... then back home for Cora's first play date.  The girls did great!  We then met Trish, Greg and Hope for lunch... they were in town just farting around, it was super nice to see them.  Saturday afternoon we just hung out at home...  lots of playing (and a 3 hour nap for lil miss). Saturday late afternoon some of the neighbor boys were over playing hoops with K and Ryan.  Lots of fun for those kiddos.  We had a quick supper at home... and then it was quiet the rest of the night.  The kids, especially Kayson, were tired.

Sunday:
Church...  then back home to pack up.  We headed down to Creston.  The afternoon we just let the kiddos play like crazy outside.  It was a beautiful day, so that was awesome.  Then we went to celebrate Jenna's graduation open house.  Again, outside and just enjoyed the weather.  It was a super nice time.   We took the kids back to Ryan's folks around 8... got them cleaned up and to bed by 9:00.  it was great.  They were all tired, and went to bed great.  Unfortunately, Cora did not sleep well.  We don't have a small blow up bed anymore for her (it busted), so we took her sleeping bag thinking that would work.  Not so much.  She started being restless about 2:30 am...  then by 2:50 she was awake and whining.  I tried everything... laying with her, laying her in the bed with Ryan and I, rocking her, just talking with her... everything.  Finally by 5:00 am, she was back in the room (bed with Ryan) and she was finally asleep.  What a terrible night.  She literally hasn't done that since she was 8 weeks old!!!  ha.  We obviously need to figure something else out when we are travelling and sleeping away.  She just doesn't do well at other people's houses. 

Anyway, Monday we woke and just started playing right away.  Another beautiful day, so we were outside in the morning... then headed home around 11:15.  We just wanted to be home and have a day at home.  I got laundry done, groceries, and more playing with the kids...  thank goodness for the gorgeous weather, otherwise, I would have been on the couch sleeping. 

It was a nice weekend...  tough to be back to work now!!  :)

Here are some great pics of the weekend.

Papa and his girls!!

Pretty decent pic!!!  Hard to get them all to have a 'real' smile!

Best buds... but can really irritate each other too!  ha.

Cool kids.  :)

Cora's 1st Play Date

Saturday morning, Cora had her first official play date with a friend.  

She has a friend, Elaina, whom we all love... she's from daycare, however, starting tomorrow, Elaina and her two younger sisters will be staying home with a nanny.  SAD FACE!!  So we have to have play dates again soon... to keep them in touch. 

Anyway, Elaina came over and they were off...  Elaina was checking out all our toys and goodies.  Cora was instantly bossing her around.  But in a nice way.  (If there's a nice way to do that???)  They actually did really well.  They were very busy, but also didn't really 'need' me at all, which was nice.  I did some random things and just let them play.  It was a great hour and a half for the two girls. 

Kayson - Last Day of 1st Grade!

The school year went SOOO FAST!!!!  As of this afternoon, Kayson is no longer a 1st Grader --- he's moved on! 
The last day of school was to be a super fun one with "Field Day", and unfortunately, the weather didn't hold up.  It was rainy all morning.  So the kids had their 'fun' inside, but Kayson did seem a little bummed that they had to be inside.  
He did say the day was pretty good tho... and lots of his friends (girl friends) cried!!!  I was shocked!!  He said some of them were sad cuz they are going to different schools next year.  (Lots of redistricting for Waukee). 

Anyway, he's learned a lot and did really well.  We loved Mrs. Turner, but now it's time to move on.  Here's to a great summer for Kayson!

Kids - Stuff, Things They Say/Do

I should have started a post like this a long time ago...  there are so many random things the kids do or say that I need to write down.  Funny things, not funny things, etc.    I'm going to try to be better at this!

Cora:

• She has a great little imagination...  uses it all the time --- playing with baby dolls, playing in the tub, and always re-inventing the things that are said at school.  This is sometimes interesting!
• Her and Kayson were playing with the cash register last night.  I got on video her telling me all about her "store".  Kayson was her "helper", and he helps her and that he is "kind of her brother".  Which made me giggle... but then she proceeded to tell me that "Kayson is my husband!"  aaahahah what?!?!  Hilarious. 
• She tells me all the time - "Mom I want to be just like you.  Can I have those shoes when I get bigger?  Can I have my hair like you, but I want it longer."  Stuff like that. 
• Cora also wants to have a baby.  She wants a "baby in her tummy and that baby will grow to be healthy, then the baby can come out."   Oh boy.  I've explained she can't have a baby til she's married.  ha. 

Kayson:

• Kayson is our sweet one in the morning.  He gets up nicely, no real fights.  He always gives me a hug and tells me good morning.  I'll ask how he slept --- "good".  
• He can get really mad at me lately -- specifically today.  He was able to take a drink to school today for their snack time.  He wanted a Gatorade.  well...  I failed to look to see if we had one last night... and then this morning he was completely devastated.  And pissed.  Oh he was so mad at me.  I told him we didn't have time to stop somewhere to get one... so he could do the flavor packet in some water.  He was less than thrilled.  And literally wouldn't speak to me on the way to school... and wouldn't even hug me when I left.  WOW.  
• He said tonight when I picked him up - "I'm still a little mad at you Mom."

 

Weekend

Well, it's officially been a traveling... long weekend!!!

Saturday:
That morning we got up and at em... packing up.  Our old neighbors were having a little birthday party for their boy... so we went to the park and celebrated with them for about an hour.   It was nice.   Then we were on the road. 
We headed down to Kansas City/Parkville for Ryan's cousin, Matt, high school graduation party.  They were having a small gathering for friends and family.  It was a beautiful, hot day down south...  the kids played in the hot sun for a couple hours.    The sun and just being in the car for such a long time, made us all tired quickly.  Kayson was begging to leave after about 3 hours.  He just can't hang.  ha.  

We got back in the car...  kids were asleep within minutes of being on the road, and we headed to Creston.  We just didn't want to get a hotel room... waste the money, and we never sleep well in a hotel, so we made the trip to Ryan's folks.  The kids slept about an hour of the almost 3 hour trip.  We didn't have supper, so we fed them 'junk' as we stopped about half way through.  We made it to Creston in good time... and pretty much got baths/showers taken and had some quiet time.  

Sunday:
Woke in Creston... after a good nights sleep for all, I think.  The kids got to bed late, but they slept til about 7:30, so not too bad.  We just hung out this morning... playing outside for the most part.  It was another beautiful day.  We had lunch, then got cleaned up to attend Jenna's graduation commencement.  Ryan is her god parent, so we felt we needed to be there for the commencement.  It was very nice, and Jenna is an amazing student!!  So proud of her.  Cora couldn't last the hour in the hot gym, so her and I wandered around the open area of the school for about 30 minutes.  It was much cooler out there too!  ha.  

We said our 'congratulations' to Jenna, got a pic... and we were on our way home.  Another snooze for Cora...  home around 5:20.  And then our Sunday duties needed done - groceries, laundry, and getting the kids to bed at a decent time.  They were both pretty owly, and picking on each other.  That's the sure sign that they are tired!!

With all the traveling, they did pretty good... seems to be they have gotten better in the car.  I know I'm wiped out tho.  I know they are too.   More traveling next weekend AND the next.  

Here are some great pics of the weekend. 

These two rascals.  Busy girls.

K loved the hoop at Uncle Todd's

The boys rolling down their HUGE hill!

I love these two.

Grandma loves painting sissy's toes and fingers.  :)

Papa giving tickles... and Cora loving it.

a goofy family pic of course.

Congrats Jenna B!   We love you!

Cora - Fresh New Cut!

Cora has needed a hair cut for awhile now...  it's just been 'hanging' there ya know!?  It needed trimmed for sure, but I actually wanted it cut - like a full blown inch - even it out.  (I don't think I'll ever really want her hair long... just seems like a lot of work and fight!!)  Well we have typically gone to Ryan's cousin, and she's great... but one day (about a month ago), Cora mentioned that she wanted Jess to cut her hair.  So we were able to get into Jess... and it worked out perfectly.  Cora did great (with the help of the iPad), but she was comfortable with Jess too.  

It's adorable... and I love it.  I'm so glad we cut a bunch off... just starting fresh.  :)  Perfect for summer.

There's the inch or so!

Thank you Jess!!!

Final look.  So cute.

2016 State Track

Friday during the day, Lacey and I decided last minute to 're-live' our high school state track memories.  It was an absolutely beautiful day to spend with my best friend.  I'm so glad she mentioned it!

I went into work for a couple hours to get a few things done, then her and I met up and got to Drake around 10:40.  We found a spot and sat there for hours... talking, cheering on random kids we didn't know!, laughing, people watching and reminiscing on our state track memories.  

What a great day.

Kayson - Baseball Updates

Here are a few pictures from some of the recent baseball games. 

Kayson is doing well...  but the normal 7 year old stuff.  Like - completely checked out after about 50 minutes of play.  ha.  I find this funny.  But overall, he knows what to do...  and hits the ball 'ok'. 

He got to be catcher...  he thought that was really cool!

This & That

• Not a ton going on here...  We had a good weekend, didn't do much.  I was actually rather bored on Saturday.  ha. 
• Since writing my thoughts about life being hard and my Mom, I've had several people reach out to say nice words to me and wish for my pain and my families pain to go away.  It's much appreciated.  I, too, wish the pain would dissolve. 

I've got some random pictures of Cora... and that's it.  Really - I got nothing exciting!

That's an ornery smile.

Bubbles!

Seriously... adorable.

Life is Hard... and Alzheimer's SUCKS.

Everyone's lives are different, that's obvious.  Whether you have multiple kids and a full time job and are busy beyond words, whether you are single and have a super important/time consuming job, whether you are older and are newly 'empty-nesters', the examples go on and on.  Everyone is busy.  Everyone's 'busy' is different than others' 'busy'.  And everyone's life is hard in some way.

For me/us, our life is good.  It really is.  Yes, we are busy (in our own little way).  Yes, we get stressed about money or time in general, but we are lucky.  But right now, life is hard for me.  I'm saying just 'me' solely because I personally am aching inside.  I put on a good front...  with my work family that I'm with for 8 hours a day; with my friends; even with Ryan and the kids sometimes.  But Ryan knows.  Ryan knows I'm aching...  because of my Mom.  Some days it's literally all I think about.  Other days, it just passes me by from time to time.  

Life is hard.  Life is really hard for my Mom.  and my Dad.  Alzheimer's SUCKS.    It's literally taken my Mom away from me, my sisters, my kids and my Dad... and MANY others.  She's no long here.  I don't have a Mom anymore.  (these are my words... as I've heard others say "Sure you have a Mom still".)  I personally don't feel that I do.  She's not the same Mom that would work hard at home getting our lives in order as kids, and taking care of everything including my Dad when he was busy in the fields.  She's not the same Mom that drove us to town for everything... hauled our butts around or supported us in every single athletic or musical event.  She's not the same Mom that used to come to my house and clean.  Yes, she'd clean.  Because she loved it!!!  She's not the same Mom that would sit and talk about everything...  and get on the floor with my kids... and hold them and snuggle.  I could go on an on.  She's not the same Mom.

I'm not good at this.  I'm not good at 'dealing' with this disease and how it's affecting her and Dad.  I simply want it to go away.  We live 1.5 hours away, and that's just it.  We don't see it.  My sister, Tricia is good with this... for the most part.  She's a nurse, she's got it in her.  However, she said to me the other day -- "I'm treating her like a patient, not Mom."  That's hard.  We are at a point where the disease is officially taken all the good out of Mom.  And I'm not good at this.  I'm not good at talking about it.  I'm not good at even crying about it.  I cry a little... and then it's gone.  It's almost like I'm numb...  It's probably cuz I'm not there all the time.  I don't see it.  But I get mad.  I get sad.  And I get mad again.  Why us?

Some people (even myself) don't really agree with how things are being handled with Mom.  We all (meaning my sisters, our husbands) know that she needs professional, medical help - she needs to be cared for by someone else than Dad.  Obviously nothing against Dad, but he can't do this.  He can't do this all the time.  We have to keep him healthy... and sane.  This is a lot of work.  We have mentioned the care center to him... and he just listened.  I get it.  He's been married to her for 51 years.  51 years.  Hard to hand that over to someone else - a stranger technically.  I get it.  We all get it.  But really...  he/we need to step back and know that the way things are being handled now is not in the best interest of Mom.  Hard to soak in.

I'm all over the place with my feelings (and this post).  Part of me gets selfish... I think of my kiddos - they don't really know their Grandma, the true Grandma that was my Mom.  They really don't know Papa Paul either, just because he's been so consumed with Mom.  He's not happy either.  It literally breaks my heart.  My feelings ache for Dad.  Can you imagine waking every day knowing that his wife is so crabby and is going to yell at him all day long, and swear up and down?!  (My Mom never cussed in the life I knew of her).  She does now.  I ache for Mom.  She's confused.  She has been hallucinating.  She's lost.  She "wants to go home" (and she's home).  She doesn't know anything that's going on with her grandkids that were HER LIFE prior to 4 years ago.  She wakes every day and doesn't know what is going on.  Nothing is there.

Life is hard.  For many reasons...  and this is our life right now.  I'm so thankful that I have Ryan and my kids, my dog, my good job to keep me distracted.  I'm lucky.  But life still is hard and stressful and sad.  Why us?

Weekend & Mother's Day 2016

Friday:
Our friends, Christina and Justin and their two boys came over Friday night.  We grilled out... and pretty much just sat and watched the kiddos play for about an hour...  and that was our night.  We had a very nice time visiting with them.  Good to see them. 

Saturday:
We slept in...  like 7:15 and then almost 8:00 for Kayson.  Pretty awesome.  We got up and at 'em, and headed out to watch Duke play baseball.  It was a really chilly morning, and I did not dress myself or the kids appropriately!!!  OOPS.  But we made the best of it, wrapped up in a blanket and cheering on Duke.  It was fun to watch.  We headed home...  a quick lunch was had... 

Ryan headed back out to watch Kyle play basketball, as they were in town again.  So glad we were free so Ryan could go watch again.  Kayson was going to go with, but he just seemed really tired, and asked if he could just stay home.  He ended up taking a 2 hour nap!!!  And Cora rested for almost 3 hours!!!  HEAVEN.  :)  I just did this and that while they rested... really enjoyed the quiet.  

After the naps, Cora and I went to do a few errands...  she needed some jammies.  Ryan and Kayson did an errand.  Productive afternoon.   Then Saturday night, Jess, Lex and the kiddos came over to hang.  It ended up being a super nice night...  They are officially in their apartment now, and were dying to get to a yard!  ha.  I have a feeling they'll be stopping by quite often until they are in their new home!  

Sunday:  
Happy Mother's Day to me!  and all the other Momma's out there.  
We went to church, and had a great time.  It was a busy morning there --- we had the dedication of the play set that we contributed to, which was super special.  Kayson cut the 'ribbon', which was cool.  Then we provided cuppie-cakes to all the special women/Momma's of the church.  The kiddos decorated the cupcakes and handed them out at fellowship time, it was so awesome.  They did great.  I loved it!

Following church, we did lunch out... then really we've just been hanging out at home.  The windows are open with a nice breeze coming in.  Ryan and Kayson are playing catch.  Cora is resting.  I'm sitting.  Nothing better than that right now. :)

It's been a good day.  I'm super blessed and thrilled to have my little family. 

With Brittlyn at Duke's baseball game.

Kayson - Behavior (Update)

Well, it's been almost two weeks since Kayson's 'problems' at school - the interrupting, blurting out and distracting the class. 

Over the last week or so, he has said that things are going well.  "I had a good day Mom."  Great.  Love it.  But being the Mom I am...  I checked in with Mrs. Turner. 

Her response:
from last week:  Kayson is doing a wonderful job of being respectful on the carpet by listening the whole time, getting started right away and continuing that behavior in the hallway.  So proud of his progress today.

from today:  Kayson is doing great and is really focused on making good choices. Thank you so much for being so supportive this year and I am so proud to be his first grade teacher.  It has been an amazing journey watching him grow. 


Done.  Checked off.  
Good.  This makes me feel good/better. 

So...  we still have 4 more weeks, but I think we are on the right track.  Kayson for sure knows his behavior earlier is not called for.  We are still doing more reading at night, he still doesn't have his iPad... and I hope we can continue the good behavior through summer.  :)  

Weekend - Kidless

About a month ago, we had mentioned to Ryan's parents that maybe they could take the kids for a weekend sometime...  well, we ended up picking a weekend, and this was it. 
Friday night we met them in a small town near by, ate supper, and they were off.  

Ryan and I went home... and ended up watching a movie on TV, which we haven't done in ages.  It was really nice, and relaxing... and quiet.  :)

Saturday, we slept in.  Literally - til 7:45.  WHAT!?!!?  It was nice, but man, my back ached!!!  We got up and started movin' slowly.  We ended up heading out around 9:30 and just did a bunch of errands - ran out to Lacey's salon, went to the mall, grabbed lunch, went to Homemakers (finally purchased a media unit for the basement!) and then headed home.  I did a load of laundry and we just kinda hung out.  Blair and Martina were in town as well (their kiddos were with Mike and JeanAnn as well)...  so we met up with them and had a drink.  It was nice to visit with them for a little bit.  They were then off to see Garth Brooks in concert, and we had dinner reservations at one of our favorite places, Malo.  

We had a nice dinner... then back home... and we watched another movie!  I wasn't nearly as interested in the Friday night movie, but it was still nice to just relax.  

We got up for church today... then Ryan stuck around for a meeting, while I came home and cleaned bathrooms.  It's funny cuz this entire weekend with no kids, I did no cleaning!  BUT the bathrooms needed it.  I got that done... and then Ryan and I headed to meet up with Mike to get the kids.  We met him in Mt. Ayr so we could see Grandma Ann.  We didn't see her at Easter, so we thought this was a good excuse to get down there, and also let the kiddos see her.  It was a nice short visit, then we headed back home.  The kids were beyond tired... and getting owly pretty quick.  They both were OUT on the way home... exhausted!!

Tonight we ordered pizza in... and just hung out.  The kids did pretty well, Cora was more than excited to be home and was really clingy to me.  Bedtime was again pretty bad for us.   Kayson said she did really well at Papa's, which is unfortunate that she can't do well here.  

Regardless, I think the kids had a good time.  Kayson talked a lot about it, told us some things him and Tate did, and he also said he's ready to go back, but hoping for better weather.  (It rained the entire time, so they couldn't go outside).  Huge bummer.  

Just a few pictures from the weekend.

with Great Great Grandma Ann (99 years old)

My beautiful sister in law.