My struggles with Cora

Cora is a little over 3 1/2 years old.  I've said several times over the past month (in my posts) that she has been a challenge for me.  Only me.  I sometimes struggle and worry that I'm just not doing a good job.  I know I am, but in the moment when there is something every minute with her, it becomes daunting and very frustrating.  I love this girl so damn much it hurts.

Some of the things she does are only for me.  If Ryan is around, she's typically pretty good (but don't get me wrong, she can be pretty bad when Ryan's home too).  She can listen to him.  She does not listen to me.  Period.

Here are some examples of the things she does.

• She talks like a baby sometimes... or most nights.  She does a lot of baby talk - like a little extra whine in her voice.  She'll talk this way, and say that she's a baby.  I find this super annoying. 
• Talking back.  This is really new actually (been going on for a couple months maybe?), but I feel that it's heavy.  It's constant.  Everything I say, she has a response and typically it's "No".  I can say that the sky is blue and she'll have a remark, and it's typically a remark in a bratty tone. Last night she argued with me that tomorrow isn't Tuesday... she got mad and said "it's Friday and it's pizza day!"  I know these are little things, but after awhile of this being non-stop, I get completely worked up.
• Eating.  This is always hit or miss... typically we do well for about a week, then the next week she won't eat.  I get it - that's her routine.  Anyway, we fight at the dinner table nearly every night.  Again, very frustrating. 
• She yells at me.  Most of the time she's yelling "Stop" or "No" to me.  Typically it's when we are trying to have a conversation or I'm asking her to do something... like eat, or pick up her toys, or get ready for bath.  "Stop" is one of her favorite words.  

I have found that I could easily just let her get away with all of this stuff... but I don't want to.  I have people tell me to 'pick your battles' with her.  I feel like I do... but when most of this stuff is dis-respectful and hurtful, I am going to be a Mom and stand my ground.  Maybe that's not right... maybe I should just step away...  I don't know.  I've never had a 3 1/2 year old like this.  Yes, Kayson had his moments, but he was not like this at all. 

and she's a girl.  

More to come on this I'm sure.  When I re-read this, I'm sure this is all normal for her age, and other children, but ugh... I don't have to like it.  :)